I did a lot of soul searching this summer. I wasn’t pondering what I wanted or needed. But, rather, HOW to get it. This surprised me. Where did this unwavering confidence come from? Despite a lot of failed attempts and disappointments, I can still find a way to think positively.
I have always been driven to succeed and in a ridiculous hurry to get there.
When it came time to go to university, I chose Public Relations but, left mid-way through the degree to complete Pastry Arts at the Culinary Institute of Canada. I am proud of that spontaneous decision to follow my heart and veer off the “plan” I had so carefully crafted for my future. Looking back, that was a huge deal for me. I later returned to finish my Public Relations degree.
Set deep within that decision to explore culinary arts was a girl wanting so desperately to live a creative life.
Every few years, I have this moment of panic when I realize that I need to go out and bathe in artistic expression; making wedding cakes, art college painting classes, food styling degree, freelance writing, starting my own handcrafted clothing company, opening a storefront, blogging… and they all fit; perfectly. I would be content to do any of one of these things full-time. But, the heartbreaking results are always the same; they don’t pay the bills.
Soul searching made me really connect all of these dots. I may have been playing with different mediums of expression; but, the heart of these actions was the same. I will never BE satisfied until I find a way to be me; glitter and all.